I Have a Message for You

“My name is Tony Stark and I’m not afraid of you” – Tony Stark aka Iron Man in Iron Man 3 (2013)

Some of you might have seen the screenshot of the message that I received on Friday. I wanted to ignore it, because frankly, it annoyed me more than it upset me, but I thought about it and by ignoring it, I am making light of the bullying that so many teens and girls have to endure day after day.

To the person who sent it, I have this to say. I wonder how you got my number because I don’t give it out in a hurry so I’m guessing that I know you. I don’t even care to know who you are, I just urge you to not do this to anyone else. I am not afraid of you, as a Muslim, I fear Allah only. 

Please sit down and ask yourself what you hoped to achieve by sending this anonymous text. Did you want me to feel bad about the way I look and my body? Because all you’ve done is made me love and appreciate what Allah has given even more. Did you want me to feel alone and isolated? Because you’ve just made me love and appreciate my friends, family, followers and readers even more. You have made me realize that if my presence can impact someone enough to take the time to buy a prepaid sim card and send an anonymous text, then my presence means something and it can inspire people to innovate and follow their dreams. You gave me a beautiful lesson in how strong I can be. Body shaming and making light of eating disorders is just not okay. Most people are just trying to find ways to love themselves and you have no right to play God and try to take that love away from them!

Bullying is a disease; it is a plague that knows no borders and boundaries. With technology now, anonymity is the order of the day and it is so easy to say horrid things to someone without them knowing who it is. We have to make an effort to be kind to each other.

To anyone reading this that is being bullied, I have this to say. You are NOT alone. There are many helplines you can call and websites you can visit, which I have put into an image below. If you are getting anonymous text messages that are hateful and harass you, you can report them to the police and open up a case because that is not legal. Remember that the person who is bullying you is the one with the problem and not you. What they are saying isn’t true at all. God made you your beautiful unique self and you shouldn’t let anyone take that away from you.

Have a look at Cybercrime’s definition for Cyberbulling here.

Victim shaming is also something that is quite rampant in our society. Parents, siblings, teachers, any figure of authority or trust reading this; if someone tells you they are being bullied, please take them seriously. Don’t say stuff like “it’s your fault.” We have to breed a society where our children and teens can feel safe and be kind. Believe me; you don’t want it to be too late. And if someone can be hurtful and violent with their words, there is no guarantee that they won’t be violent with their hands and feet.

I’ve listed some resources below that might be able to give you some extra insight and help you out if you or someone you love is being cyberbullied.

DOC - Department of Communications - Child Online Protection
ECS-CSIRT - Electronic Communications Security - Computer Security Incident Response Team
FPB - Film and Publication Board - Pro Child
ISPA - Internet Service Providers' Association - Code of Conduct
SAPS - South African Police Service - Youth Desk
UJ Centre of Excellence in Cyber Security

I just hope that this experience can be a productive lesson to us all, instead of something ugly and allowing the bully to win. I am a Muslim and my religion teaches me about peace, love and acceptance. 

If you are having issues with bullies and you want to talk to someone about it, you can email me on zaakiram@hotmail.com

Until next time,

Love, peace, kindness and sparkles

Zaakira xox